New element discovered
The heaviest element known to science was recently discovered by physicists. The element, tentatively named Administratium, has no protons or electrons and thus has an atomic number of 0. However, it does have 1 neutron, 125 assistant neutrons, 75 vice neutrons and 111 assistant vice neutrons, for an atomic number of 312.
The 312 particles are held together by a force that involves the continuous exchange of meson-like particles called morons.
Since it has no electrons, Administratium is inert. However, it can be detected chemically, as it impedes every action with which it comes into contact. According to the discoverers, one reaction that normally requires less than one second was extended to four days by the presence of a minute amount of Administratium.
Half-life & decay process
Administratium has a half life of approximately three years, at which time it does not actually decay but instead undergoes a reorganisation in which assistant neutrons, vice neutrons and assistant vice neutrons exchange places. Some studies suggest that its atomic mass actually increases in each reorganisation.
Research at other laboratories indicates that Administratium occurs naturally in the atmosphere. It tends to concentrate at certain points, such as government agencies, large corporations, and universities, and can usually be found in the newest, best appointed, and maintained buildings.
Scientists point out that Administratium is known to be toxic at any level of concentration and can easily destroy any productive reaction where it is allowed to accumulate. Attempts are being made to determine how Administratium can be controlled to prevent irreversible damage, but results to date are not promising. All attempts to control it have resulted in an immediate doubling of its quantity and an increase in its rate of activity.
It has now been found by physicists that the dediworkertrons half life decays very quickly with an injection of Administratium. This is due to the vast absorption of the Fundinuclei to keep the nucleus of the Administratium active. This absorption causes the possipromotitron to be almost eradicated, except when influenced by the whoyouknow nuclei, or the possimason effect. This causes a mutant syndrome, with tremendous growth in some of the lesserworkertrons.
The biggest worry of the physicists and scientists, is that this will eventually have an overwhelmingly destructive effect on the dediworkertrons; it could almost wipe it out if the Administratium cannot be confined within its element, and the absorption of the Fundinuclei radically stemmed.